Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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