do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
You made out with two different species that night
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
