And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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