Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
