rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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