I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
one two three fourrrrnication!
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
