Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
