you traded sex for a burrito?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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