John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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