I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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