How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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