...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
don't judge my taste in strippers
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
