why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
