fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
My balls are so social today.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
