She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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