She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
