Christians are straight up FREAKS
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
It's official drugs can't kill me
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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