im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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