if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
