I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
