There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize
