Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
