I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
