I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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