wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
There r osticjed everywhere
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
