i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
