Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
