Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
