break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize