Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
