Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
