Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
