When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
