We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize