Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
