just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
