Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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