Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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