Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
