gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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