Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
