This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
