I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
