he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
