Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
