My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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