You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
you never un-have a 4some
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
