It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
