please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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