you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
